Picture Problems

I noticed something last week. I notice a lot of things, mostly involving odors, but this was fairly important. We haven't had professional pictures taken in about a year.

We're devolving into less frequent picture excursions. Abbie had her first set of professional pictures taken at 3-months-old. She had sets taken at 6, 9, 12, and 18-months too. We have expert photographic evidence of her growth for her first year and half, but then something monumental changed. Abbie stopped being an only child.

The boys were born when Abbie was about 18-months-old, and traveling to the photographer's studio became much harder. We still braved it every six months, but the visits stopped for some forgotten reason about a year ago. Abbie still had her picture taken at school, so she was still spending time in front of the camera, but the boys' growth continued undocumented except for visits to the zoo and a handful of other times that I remembered to use our camera. I rectified this situation and set an appointment for this morning.

Our goal was to take a picture of each child individually, a picture of the boys, a picture of all three children, and a family picture. Mommy bought brand new outfits to maximize the adorability of the photos, and to ensure the grandparents would have pictures they could proudly stick on their refrigerators.

Abbie went first. If she learned one thing from her first year in preschool, it was how to pose for a picture. Abbie blazed through three cute poses in about two minutes. She left the room to watch a video in the waiting area while the boys took their turn.

While the boys were waiting, they had been fighting over a toy truck. Ian took the truck in front of the camera while Tory screamed for it in the background. After a couple quick poses, Tory stepped in front of the camera while Ian screamed for the truck.

Things broke down at this point. This toy truck was the key to calming the boys, but there was only one. Give the truck to one boy, and the other screamed. Take the truck away, and both screamed. We were able to convince them to share it, but their attitudes quickly regressed from uneasy to grumpy to cranky. We managed one quick photo where neither boy looked too upset, but we pressed our luck and tried for another photo where both boys looked vaguely happy.

A half-hour later, Abbie's video was done and both boys were in full tantrum. We let the boys take a break while mommy and Abbie posed. 30 seconds later, we had a beautiful mommy-daughter picture and two screaming boys. Dejected, I packed the kids into the car while mommy finalized the order.

I sat in the car with the kids for another half-hour while mommy haggled over which poses and picture packages she wanted to order. I used that time to memorize why we don't go out for pictures anymore. It's too expensive. The session takes too long. I'm always exhausted when the session ends. And we still don't get that family photo we wanted. Maybe we can try again when the boys have had a year of preschool.