My Baby Beat Me Up
I've suffered a lot of parenting injuries. Bite marks. Bruises from being kicked. Untold mental anguish. Tory found a new way to hurt me today when he almost blew out my knee.
I was in our bedroom putting away laundry this morning. None of our children are supposed to be in our bedroom. It's the only room in the house where I can leave small, fragile objects in convenient locations in all of their non-childproofed glory.
As I left the room, Tory snuck around the corner and, sensing small fragile objects within his reach, ran into our room. I didn't know he was coming, and stepped into the doorway in time to meet him. Tory's forehead collided with my knee at full toddler speed. You'd think the result would be a kneecap to his head, giving him the worst of the impact. Somehow, though, his forehead struck right behind my kneecap, and apparently hit a ligament at exactly the wrong moment.
I collapsed onto our bed, rolling around until I was sure my knee could support weight. Tory staggered backward for a minute stunned from the impact, but quickly regained his senses and continued on his beeline for my stuff. I regained my senses in time to shoo him out of the room, with me limping behind.
I'm not sure what he did to me; I'm guessing it's a slight knee ligament strain. In sports terms, I'm probable for tomorrow. In realistic terms, I'm definite for tomorrow; nobody else will be around to keep the kids out of my stuff.
I was in our bedroom putting away laundry this morning. None of our children are supposed to be in our bedroom. It's the only room in the house where I can leave small, fragile objects in convenient locations in all of their non-childproofed glory.
As I left the room, Tory snuck around the corner and, sensing small fragile objects within his reach, ran into our room. I didn't know he was coming, and stepped into the doorway in time to meet him. Tory's forehead collided with my knee at full toddler speed. You'd think the result would be a kneecap to his head, giving him the worst of the impact. Somehow, though, his forehead struck right behind my kneecap, and apparently hit a ligament at exactly the wrong moment.
I collapsed onto our bed, rolling around until I was sure my knee could support weight. Tory staggered backward for a minute stunned from the impact, but quickly regained his senses and continued on his beeline for my stuff. I regained my senses in time to shoo him out of the room, with me limping behind.
I'm not sure what he did to me; I'm guessing it's a slight knee ligament strain. In sports terms, I'm probable for tomorrow. In realistic terms, I'm definite for tomorrow; nobody else will be around to keep the kids out of my stuff.
posted by Matt at
11:32 PM
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