Parking Problems

Parking my vehicle, much like every other minutiae of daily life, was infinitely easier before children. I pulled into a spot, departed my car, and walked to my destination. It was so simple a DINK could do it.

Pulling into a parking spot is harder now because my car is so much bigger and less agile. I need a bigger car to haul my 20-cubic feet of children, and the 40-cubic feet of seats, toys, and spare clothes they require every time we leave the house. That’s a lot of extra vehicle space to cram into a tight spot.

Departing my car is harder now because I have to do everything in quadruplicate. I unbuckle my safety belt, step out of the car, and unbuckle and remove my three kids. Occasionally I have to take an unbuckling break to ensure that a recently-released child hasn’t wandered away while my attention was elsewhere.

Walking to my destination is flat-out impossible now. Because I’m so busy packing the children into the car, searching for a parking spot with enough room, and releasing three helpless children from their restraints, I’m always running late. If I’m going to make an appointment on time, or at least before the person I’m meeting gives up and goes home, I have to run, not walk, to the appointment. Fortunately the kids help me out on that one by scrambling in different directions as we move to the destination, so I’m always running anyway.

I had a hard time finding a suitable parking spot today when I drove Abbie to speech therapy. The office has six adjacent parking spots out front. The first spot was open, but I don’t like parking there for reasons involving a pole next to the spot and a lot of duct tape that now decorates my bumper. The second spot was taken. The third and fourth spots were also taken, but by one car that parked down the center of the dividing line. The fifth spot was taken by a car with its passenger tires almost straddling the fifth and sixth spot’s dividing line, possibly because it was intimidated by the double-space taker next to it. The sixth spot was open as long as I didn’t mind parking next to a vehicle that left me no room to squeeze out my door.

I could park in the pole spot. I could wedge my car next to the double-space taker. Or I could squeeze next to the line-straddler. I chose the line-straddler.

When I departed my car, I noticed the line-straddler still had a passenger sitting in it apparently waiting for someone’s appointment to end. I had to be extra careful while pulling the kids out of the car lest I door ding them while the passenger witnesses it. And I had to pull the kids out in a hurry because we were already late.

I pulled the kids out while holding the door in place with one foot. It was a windy day, and the wind constantly threatened to grab my door and ding the bejeebers out of the neighbors in front of a potential witness. With great balance and a lot of hustle, we made it to the appointment before the speech therapist left.