Gotta Keep 'Em Separated

I have received a number* of questions on the blog about how I tell the twins apart. All newborns look the same, and we have two of them with the same equipment. I’m to the point where I can tell them apart by looking at them as long as they’re side by side. I can vaguely recognize facial features if I can compare and contrast. We haven’t yet resorted to semi-permanent tricks to identify them like painting their nails, though I do know that Tory still has a scab on his toe from the time I cut him with the nail clippers. We have ruled out permanent identification tricks like unique ear piercings or, as my father-in-law suggested, only circumcising one boy.

Like I said, I know their faces, but they have to be side by side. Tory is plumper, which is especially noticeable in his chubbier cheeks. If we can get them to smile, Ian has bigger dimples, though that may be a result of his leaner cheeks. I can also pick one up to identify them, as Tory is about a pound heavier, which is pretty noticeable when talking about 8-pound babies. Tory is also about an inch longer, though that’s hardly noticeable when they’re both wearing sleepers that are several inches longer than their bodies.

That’s about it for physical differences. I still don’t know if they’re identical or not, but they look similar regardless. In pregnancy, Ellie’s OB said that with the way they developed, they were probably fraternal, but there was a 25% chance they were identical. I still feel the same way; they’re probably fraternal, but there’s significant chance they’re identical.

They may develop wildly different personalities, but for now they still have the newborn tabula rasa personality. Ian seems a little more laid back, and Tory is a little quicker to cry to the point of refusing to inhale, but otherwise they act similar. The biggest personality difference is in feeding where Tory consistently eats faster, eats more, and, probably relatedly, spits up more.

I use a few tricks to keep them separate. During sleeping and feeding, Ian is always on the left, and Tory on the right. This ritual goes back to when the NICU decreed which baby stays on which side in their cribs. I also try to dress them in different colors, with Tory wearing the blue outfits, approximately half their wardrobe, and Ian wearing every other color we own. I chose these colors because our smallest outfits, preemie and newborn sizes, seemed to be more unisex colors, so I put our smallest child in the smallest outfits.

Otherwise they’re pretty similar. I still confuse them briefly, but I know enough about them to keep them straight when I do mix them. Just compare sizes, and I know exactly who’s who. Or if that fails, find the one with the scabbed toe.

* One.