"Oh no! They're biting him, and stealing his pants!"
We’re working on this biting habit. In case you need a reminder, Abbie has developed a habit … of biting. She bites hard, but so far she only bites mommy and daddy, so at least strangers don’t have to discover how much toddler teeth can hurt. This habit is especially embarrassing in a public space where I can feel the eyes of the childless, or those who’ve forgotten how their young children behaved, judging us. I’ll be carrying my smiling toddler and telepathically hear the room think “no wonder that’s such a happy child, she has a great father,” when all of sudden she’ll bite my shoulder, I’ll start yelling, and the room will instantly change its thoughts to “of course she acts like that with an ape of a father. Ooh, 20-oz. Bottles of Coke Zero for 75¢.”
I’ve been scouring the internet searching for help stopping her biting behavior. Judging from my e-mail, the internet is a great source for finding information on everything from cheap places to buy Ci@1is and V!agra to a site where I can get a free video camera, so it probably has some parenting information, too. Perhaps someone, somewhere wrote a list of techniques to stop toddlers from biting on a blog. I found tons of posts on message boards from haggled parents, some with better grammar than others, asking for help in breaking the biting habit. Since internet message boards are generally public places where anyone can post regardless of qualifications or motive, the information varies greatly in quality. Many people suggested that when a toddler bites you, bite back, a technique that apparently works great with hair pulling, too. I can practically see these frazzled parents reply, “No luck, he keeps biting me no matter how much I bite him back. I don’t understand, it’s like he somehow learned that biting is an acceptable behavior.”
Thoroughly disgusted by the keyboard tappings of know-nothing strangers on internet message boards, I decided to look for advice from more authoritative strangers, or at least strangers authoritative enough to write on websites with knowledgeable-sounding names like babycentral.com or howtostoptoddlersfrombiting.com. On one of these sites I found an entire article on the topic of stopping a toddler from biting. This person was very authoritative, as judged by the fact that she mocked the “bite back” theory. Her advice was to give the child a commanding “no,” then leave the child alone in a boring, safe spot for a minute as a timeout. I’ve been reluctant to say “no” to Abbie, not because I’m some hippie-freak who doesn’t want my child to feel boundaries, but because I don’t want her learning to shout “no” back at me. I should probably wait until she actually starts talking before worrying about such things, but I’ve modified it to “don’t bite,” which probably means she’ll learn to shout “don’t” at me instead. I’ve also been reluctant to put her in any timeouts yet because I think she’s too young to understand why she’s in a timeout, or even understand that she’s in a timeout. Plus, I think she usually bites when she wants set down, and setting her down seems counterproductive to stopping the biting, but I’m following the advice of this authoritative woman writing on a knowledgeable-sounding website and setting her in her crib when she bites. If nothing else, it gives me a guilt-free minute of rest while she screams, which is just enough time to enjoy a 20-oz bottle of pop.
I’ve been scouring the internet searching for help stopping her biting behavior. Judging from my e-mail, the internet is a great source for finding information on everything from cheap places to buy Ci@1is and V!agra to a site where I can get a free video camera, so it probably has some parenting information, too. Perhaps someone, somewhere wrote a list of techniques to stop toddlers from biting on a blog. I found tons of posts on message boards from haggled parents, some with better grammar than others, asking for help in breaking the biting habit. Since internet message boards are generally public places where anyone can post regardless of qualifications or motive, the information varies greatly in quality. Many people suggested that when a toddler bites you, bite back, a technique that apparently works great with hair pulling, too. I can practically see these frazzled parents reply, “No luck, he keeps biting me no matter how much I bite him back. I don’t understand, it’s like he somehow learned that biting is an acceptable behavior.”
Thoroughly disgusted by the keyboard tappings of know-nothing strangers on internet message boards, I decided to look for advice from more authoritative strangers, or at least strangers authoritative enough to write on websites with knowledgeable-sounding names like babycentral.com or howtostoptoddlersfrombiting.com. On one of these sites I found an entire article on the topic of stopping a toddler from biting. This person was very authoritative, as judged by the fact that she mocked the “bite back” theory. Her advice was to give the child a commanding “no,” then leave the child alone in a boring, safe spot for a minute as a timeout. I’ve been reluctant to say “no” to Abbie, not because I’m some hippie-freak who doesn’t want my child to feel boundaries, but because I don’t want her learning to shout “no” back at me. I should probably wait until she actually starts talking before worrying about such things, but I’ve modified it to “don’t bite,” which probably means she’ll learn to shout “don’t” at me instead. I’ve also been reluctant to put her in any timeouts yet because I think she’s too young to understand why she’s in a timeout, or even understand that she’s in a timeout. Plus, I think she usually bites when she wants set down, and setting her down seems counterproductive to stopping the biting, but I’m following the advice of this authoritative woman writing on a knowledgeable-sounding website and setting her in her crib when she bites. If nothing else, it gives me a guilt-free minute of rest while she screams, which is just enough time to enjoy a 20-oz bottle of pop.
posted by Matt at
9:39 PM
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