Awkward
We took the children to the mall playground a couple days ago. While the children burned energy, mommy relaxed with a little shopping, and I sat with the kids and fretted over how much shopping mommy was doing.
It was a slow night at the playground. It's summer, so school is out, and all the mallrats had already fulfilled their mall time earlier in the day. Back-to-school shopping didn't start for a couple more weeks, and the Christmas shopping season was still several days away. Most of the other guardians at the playground appeared to be fathers like me, watching their children and fretting about how much shopping their wife was doing.
Eventually, a couple of women sat near me with an 18-month-old boy in a stroller. The boys, who had been happily playing on the playground most of this time, took notice of my new neighbors. Tory wandered to my side and stared. After a minute he pointed at the boy and announced, "It's a brown baby."
I kept a smile on my face while watching Tory watching this African-American group. Apparently they didn't hear or understand Tory, which was fine by me. I punted on this opportunity to teach Tory about race and how we're all the same inside even though we may look different on the outside. I ignored him for fear that a little encouragement might lead to an announcement of the skin color of every child he sees.
We live in a homogeneous suburb, and the boys don't see many people who aren't our pasty relatives. Abbie's preschool class had a few minorities, but otherwise almost everyone we see is white. It may have never occurred to the boys that people came in different shades, not even after extensive exposure to Dora.
Eventually Tory lost interest and wandered away, freeing a spot for Ian to stand and stare. Ian stared at the group for an uncomfortably long time despite my repeated attempts to distract him. The group was splitting a hot dog at the time, and I told the woman nearest me that he must be staring at their food. That may have been at least partly true, but Ian kept staring after the food disappeared.
Ian finally lost interest and left to play, freeing a spot for Abbie. Abbie paid no attention to our neighbors. Instead, she expressed her desire to leave. We'd been at the mall for 45 minutes, and that was enough for her. Knowing mommy had been shopping most of this time, I had to agree with her.
It was a slow night at the playground. It's summer, so school is out, and all the mallrats had already fulfilled their mall time earlier in the day. Back-to-school shopping didn't start for a couple more weeks, and the Christmas shopping season was still several days away. Most of the other guardians at the playground appeared to be fathers like me, watching their children and fretting about how much shopping their wife was doing.
Eventually, a couple of women sat near me with an 18-month-old boy in a stroller. The boys, who had been happily playing on the playground most of this time, took notice of my new neighbors. Tory wandered to my side and stared. After a minute he pointed at the boy and announced, "It's a brown baby."
I kept a smile on my face while watching Tory watching this African-American group. Apparently they didn't hear or understand Tory, which was fine by me. I punted on this opportunity to teach Tory about race and how we're all the same inside even though we may look different on the outside. I ignored him for fear that a little encouragement might lead to an announcement of the skin color of every child he sees.
We live in a homogeneous suburb, and the boys don't see many people who aren't our pasty relatives. Abbie's preschool class had a few minorities, but otherwise almost everyone we see is white. It may have never occurred to the boys that people came in different shades, not even after extensive exposure to Dora.
Eventually Tory lost interest and wandered away, freeing a spot for Ian to stand and stare. Ian stared at the group for an uncomfortably long time despite my repeated attempts to distract him. The group was splitting a hot dog at the time, and I told the woman nearest me that he must be staring at their food. That may have been at least partly true, but Ian kept staring after the food disappeared.
Ian finally lost interest and left to play, freeing a spot for Abbie. Abbie paid no attention to our neighbors. Instead, she expressed her desire to leave. We'd been at the mall for 45 minutes, and that was enough for her. Knowing mommy had been shopping most of this time, I had to agree with her.
posted by Matt at
11:25 PM
2 Comments:
When my sister MK was little she told EVERYONE that she wanted to be reincarnated (no idea where a kindergartener learned about that) as a "brown girl" so that she could have cool hair. We figured at least she was being complimentary!
By
Anonymous, at 3:30 AM
We live in a community that is majority white, as well. However, my husband's best friend is black and they've been around him since birth and they regularly see a couple of black people I work with. I'm actually surprised they haven't questioned it before.
I don't think that's offensive, though. At some point, every child notices something that is different about someone when compared to themselves. It's just in a child's nature to ask questions.
By
Amy, at 5:27 PM
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