How I Got in Trouble

We visited good friend and frequent commenter Patty last week for a play date. In between my marveling at my kids’ fascination with her toys and scrambling to pick up the food they threw at lunch, Patty and I had some quality conversation. My ears perked up when she mentioned that she had a new set of hair cutting equipment, complete with electric clippers.

I’m terrible about haircuts. Most people measure their time between haircuts in weeks. I measure my time between haircuts in months. I grow it long, cut it short, and repeat. That routine follows my belief in cheapskateness by minimizing the number of times I have to pay for a haircut. It also adheres to my aversion to sitting idly since I don’t have to waste time sitting for a haircut. As a parent I don’t know what to do with idle time anyway.

Our children are doomed to follow the same haircutting routine as their primary caregiver. I know it’s time to cut Abbie’s hair when the collected food makes it too difficult to brush her hair, or when her bangs cover her eyes and give her the Cousin It look. I haven’t figured out when to cut the boys’ hair yet, but I knew it was too long. I don’t mind if they have the surfer look, but they need to be old enough to care for it by keeping it pulled back. Their hair was cascading down all sides of their heads, and it was developing the same curl at the ends that my hair gets when I know it’s time for a haircut.

I asked to borrow Patty’s hair clippers, and she brought them down for us. I picked up the clippers and selected a setting* while Patty held the boys. I ran the clippers all around their hair, giving them the most even haircut I could manage. Patty then took the clippers and a pair of scissors to fix the style I inflicted on them. The result is they went from this a week ago (Tory is in the foreground, Ian is in the background):


To this during Halloween (again, Tory is in the foreground, Ian is in the background):


Mommy loved the surfer look, even the unkempt surfer look they had. She did not appreciate us (specifically me) cutting their hair. She especially did not appreciate the fact that the only notice I gave her was saying, “the boys look a little different” as she walked in the door coming home from work.

I think mommy has forgiven us (me). It took several days of passed time and compliments from others about how grown up they look with their new hair, but mommy is at least speaking to me again. One of the things she’s saying to me is that I need a haircut.

* Setting #4 sounded like a good, mid-range length.