Golden Bond
Our boys share a special bond. All brothers do, but their status as twins makes it more so. They’ve literally spent every day since conception next to each other, sharing experiences, and poking and prodding each other to discover what makes the other tick.
Seriously, they’re poking and prodding each other constantly. And hitting. And biting. I think they’re trying to find the other one’s weak points for easier stealing of food and toys.
Tory is transforming into a violent little man. Somewhere, probably from Abbie, he picked up the habit of hitting people. When he wants something such as crackers or Ian’s toy, he walks up to the target and starts smacking the person open-palmed. I’m sure he’s being vicious by 20-month-old standards, but it’s almost adorable when he hits me. The dog’s wagging tail hits harder than he does slapping my leg. I never know if he’s hitting me or just steadying himself as he toddles past. When he hits me, I take a second to compose myself so I don’t laugh, and firmly redirect him. Only after turning his head do I smirk at him.
When Tory hits Ian, that’s a different matter. Tory hits him once in the chest, waits to see if Ian gives up the toy, and hits again, repeating the process until Ian surrenders, or until I move him to another room. If I redirect him to a few steps away, he’ll turn around and go right back after Ian. Ian usually stands still, giving Tory repeated free shots. While I’m glad he doesn’t fight back lest the altercation escalate, I wish he’d parry, move away, or do something protective. I haven’t seen it on any developmental chart, but I’m hoping the “defends self from sibling attack” milestone pops up around 24 months. Maybe he’s also trying to figure out what Tory thinks he’s doing.
Tory doesn’t really attack Abbie. Perhaps he did in the past, and Abbie taught him a lesson far more efficiently than any time out could.
Ian’s aggression is more innocent, though he hurts more. He likes to sit on people. If I lie down, he’ll walk up to me with a giant grin, straddle his legs around my shoulders, and sit. Then he’ll stand back up, and sit again, bouncing repeatedly until I can muster the strength to make him stop crushing my airway. This is cute until I start losing consciousness from lack of oxygen.
It’s cuter when he goes after Tory, at least at first. He bounces on him, and they both laugh. He bounces again, and Tory starts getting concerned. He continues bouncing, and Tory starts screaming. I’ve had to walk into their bedroom several times right after setting them down for a nap to pull a giggling Ian off his screaming brother.
Ian will also sit on Abbie, which is cutest of all. Abbie can take it, laughing with him. If he gets too much, she’s strong enough to dump him on the floor, and everybody laughs. If he’s quick, Tory might then get revenge by hopping on top of him while he’s vulnerable.
So far, they can make each other laugh, and make each other scream. Does that qualify as a bond?
Seriously, they’re poking and prodding each other constantly. And hitting. And biting. I think they’re trying to find the other one’s weak points for easier stealing of food and toys.
Tory is transforming into a violent little man. Somewhere, probably from Abbie, he picked up the habit of hitting people. When he wants something such as crackers or Ian’s toy, he walks up to the target and starts smacking the person open-palmed. I’m sure he’s being vicious by 20-month-old standards, but it’s almost adorable when he hits me. The dog’s wagging tail hits harder than he does slapping my leg. I never know if he’s hitting me or just steadying himself as he toddles past. When he hits me, I take a second to compose myself so I don’t laugh, and firmly redirect him. Only after turning his head do I smirk at him.
When Tory hits Ian, that’s a different matter. Tory hits him once in the chest, waits to see if Ian gives up the toy, and hits again, repeating the process until Ian surrenders, or until I move him to another room. If I redirect him to a few steps away, he’ll turn around and go right back after Ian. Ian usually stands still, giving Tory repeated free shots. While I’m glad he doesn’t fight back lest the altercation escalate, I wish he’d parry, move away, or do something protective. I haven’t seen it on any developmental chart, but I’m hoping the “defends self from sibling attack” milestone pops up around 24 months. Maybe he’s also trying to figure out what Tory thinks he’s doing.
Tory doesn’t really attack Abbie. Perhaps he did in the past, and Abbie taught him a lesson far more efficiently than any time out could.
Ian’s aggression is more innocent, though he hurts more. He likes to sit on people. If I lie down, he’ll walk up to me with a giant grin, straddle his legs around my shoulders, and sit. Then he’ll stand back up, and sit again, bouncing repeatedly until I can muster the strength to make him stop crushing my airway. This is cute until I start losing consciousness from lack of oxygen.
It’s cuter when he goes after Tory, at least at first. He bounces on him, and they both laugh. He bounces again, and Tory starts getting concerned. He continues bouncing, and Tory starts screaming. I’ve had to walk into their bedroom several times right after setting them down for a nap to pull a giggling Ian off his screaming brother.
Ian will also sit on Abbie, which is cutest of all. Abbie can take it, laughing with him. If he gets too much, she’s strong enough to dump him on the floor, and everybody laughs. If he’s quick, Tory might then get revenge by hopping on top of him while he’s vulnerable.
So far, they can make each other laugh, and make each other scream. Does that qualify as a bond?
posted by Matt at
11:35 PM
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