Grocery Getters
Ian? Still sick. Abbie? Still two-and-a-half. Tory? Still self-centered. Time to take everyone grocery shopping!
Due to Ellie’s work schedule, last night was my last chance to buy groceries for a few days. Oh sure, I could’ve taken all three kids to the grocery store with no adult help. I wouldn’t make it past the produce before they kicked me out for bringing multiple screaming children into the store. That assumes I didn’t get arrested first on child endangerment for (a) leaving Abbie to run about the store alone while I loaded groceries into the cart, or (b) leaving the boys alone in the cart while I chased Abbie about the store. Ellie’s presence gives an extra set of hands to calm screaming children, plus an extra adult to divert the authorities while I finish loading the cart before anyone can get our names.
Ian has been doing worse at night, and I knew that. He whimpers in the morning, whines in the afternoon, and screams at night. I would’ve loved to leave him at home to scream, but everyone needed to go shopping. Ellie needed to pick out a few snacks to bring to work, plus I needed to replenish my lunch apples, and I can’t trust anyone else to pick out non-bruised fruit for me.
Ellie loaded the boys in the stroller and pushed them about the store to keep them entertained, while I took Abbie and the grocery cart. The boys were content while the stroller moved, keeping the array of sugar/fat/salt infused, candy-colored items at their eye level flying past. As soon as they stopped, though, someone started screaming, possibly because he realized the crinkly-wrapped snack food was just beyond arm’s reach. Ellie did many laps around the aisles to keep things quiet.
Abbie and I didn’t fare as well. She’s always been a handful in the grocery store. Up until about 4-months, I could trust her to sleep in her carrier while I shopped. After that, I needed to carry her while shopping with one free hand to keep her entertained. By a year-old, she was too heavy to carry throughout the store, so I strapped her in the cart seat and shoved toys in her face the entire trip to keep her entertained.
Now, Abbie is too big to fit in the cart seat, and I’m still trying to figure out how to keep her entertained. I let her run outside the cart, but whenever I stopped, she tended to keep moving. By the time I figured out which peanut butter had the lowest sugar and found the corresponding 25-cent coupon, she was in the pasta aisle. I found her holding a box of elbow macaroni, about to tear into it in search of the cheese sauce that always accompanies macaroni.
I put her in the cart, hoping the ride would entertain her. Instead, she derived entertainment by crushing the strawberries, at first inadvertently by marching side-to-side, but eventually she discovered them and started poking the package in hopes of popping a couple in her mouth.
I returned her to the floor and ran with her. I didn’t stop to pick up anything, but instead knocked items into the cart as we sped past. This worked well until we reached dairy and I needed to pick out the correctly flavored yogurts from the line-up of regulars, lites, whippeds, lo-carbs, fruit-on-the-bottoms, and pro-biotics. By this time, Ian was screaming, probably because Tory kept kicking him from behind, and Abbie wouldn’t stand still. I locked Ian in my cart’s seat, and Ellie took Abbie and Tory out to the car while I finished shopping. This worked well because I could keep Ian entertained with toys, and our screaming children left the store before an employee could catch up to them to ask us to leave.
Due to Ellie’s work schedule, last night was my last chance to buy groceries for a few days. Oh sure, I could’ve taken all three kids to the grocery store with no adult help. I wouldn’t make it past the produce before they kicked me out for bringing multiple screaming children into the store. That assumes I didn’t get arrested first on child endangerment for (a) leaving Abbie to run about the store alone while I loaded groceries into the cart, or (b) leaving the boys alone in the cart while I chased Abbie about the store. Ellie’s presence gives an extra set of hands to calm screaming children, plus an extra adult to divert the authorities while I finish loading the cart before anyone can get our names.
Ian has been doing worse at night, and I knew that. He whimpers in the morning, whines in the afternoon, and screams at night. I would’ve loved to leave him at home to scream, but everyone needed to go shopping. Ellie needed to pick out a few snacks to bring to work, plus I needed to replenish my lunch apples, and I can’t trust anyone else to pick out non-bruised fruit for me.
Ellie loaded the boys in the stroller and pushed them about the store to keep them entertained, while I took Abbie and the grocery cart. The boys were content while the stroller moved, keeping the array of sugar/fat/salt infused, candy-colored items at their eye level flying past. As soon as they stopped, though, someone started screaming, possibly because he realized the crinkly-wrapped snack food was just beyond arm’s reach. Ellie did many laps around the aisles to keep things quiet.
Abbie and I didn’t fare as well. She’s always been a handful in the grocery store. Up until about 4-months, I could trust her to sleep in her carrier while I shopped. After that, I needed to carry her while shopping with one free hand to keep her entertained. By a year-old, she was too heavy to carry throughout the store, so I strapped her in the cart seat and shoved toys in her face the entire trip to keep her entertained.
Now, Abbie is too big to fit in the cart seat, and I’m still trying to figure out how to keep her entertained. I let her run outside the cart, but whenever I stopped, she tended to keep moving. By the time I figured out which peanut butter had the lowest sugar and found the corresponding 25-cent coupon, she was in the pasta aisle. I found her holding a box of elbow macaroni, about to tear into it in search of the cheese sauce that always accompanies macaroni.
I put her in the cart, hoping the ride would entertain her. Instead, she derived entertainment by crushing the strawberries, at first inadvertently by marching side-to-side, but eventually she discovered them and started poking the package in hopes of popping a couple in her mouth.
I returned her to the floor and ran with her. I didn’t stop to pick up anything, but instead knocked items into the cart as we sped past. This worked well until we reached dairy and I needed to pick out the correctly flavored yogurts from the line-up of regulars, lites, whippeds, lo-carbs, fruit-on-the-bottoms, and pro-biotics. By this time, Ian was screaming, probably because Tory kept kicking him from behind, and Abbie wouldn’t stand still. I locked Ian in my cart’s seat, and Ellie took Abbie and Tory out to the car while I finished shopping. This worked well because I could keep Ian entertained with toys, and our screaming children left the store before an employee could catch up to them to ask us to leave.
posted by Matt at
11:44 PM
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